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Okay y’all…

that photo…

of the gal doing a truly righteous head stand…

on a paddle board…

on the water…

at sunset…

in Hawaii.

It’s SOOOOOO not of me.

But lawdybe if that’s not the very image I have housed in my head of how my 50th birthday will be ushered in and celebrated.

Sup board

When I purchased my paddle board a year and a half ago, picked one that had a wider table allowing me to more easily combine my love of yoga with my love of supping.

My ‘yoga-water’ moves, in the beginning, had more of an aqua-bound acrobatic-esque quality to them than a strong, solid, balanced yoga-esque one.

In fact my truly outstanding moves only served as full-blown, belly bustin laughable, entertainment for my daughter. And startled amusement to the manatees that swam near by.  I was floppin in the water more than I was standin, sittin, or posin’ (yep that’s me below…just a-posin’) all together on the board. And folks, when I fall there is not an ounce of gracefulness to it.

IMG_4771Yet even with all the hilarity my “yoga-water” moves brought, the vision of me doing a head stand on my board by my 50th birthday never faltered.

Then this past November a truly beautiful gift was brought to my world…

Ms. Capricorn, her yoga studio, and an entire tribe of yogis (read a bit more about them @ Fussy, Diamond, Ms. Capricorn and an entire tribe of yogis~ ) crossed paths with mine and my world evolved and expanded all the more.

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Ms. Capricorn (yep that’s her above, using no head. Such a show off ;- ) ) was unlike anyone I had every met.

Solid yet fluid.

Tiny yet mighty.

Serious yet OHHHH soooo witty.

Strong yet soft.

Confident yet humble.

Generous of spirit and knowledge.

Gracious with all she interacts with.

I liked her, straight away. And my spirit felt at home in her presence. Something that has only happened instantly a handful of times in my life and has ALWAYS proven to be some of the most cherished and impactful relationships to my life.

When I first began practicing yoga at the studio I wasn’t at all concerned about sticking a head stand. Nope, I was only concerning myself with the horrific thought I had of toppling over unto the lady next to me doing her perfected warrior stand and causing a domino effect throughout the entire studio. Thankfully none of that mess happened and as time went on my domino-effecting-terror-thought, gave way to receiving, learning and becoming.

Yoga, Ms Capricorn, and this amazing tribe I now call friends, taught me that yoga is not a destination to doing. But rather is a gift of being.

In the seven months since beginning this practice I’ve become awe-struck at how quickly our bodies can learn, grow and even become…graceful. Daily I’m astounded to see folks of all ages, sizes, and abilities doing astonishing things with their bodies. These things I once thought would never be possible for me and my body to do, are now very things I do or I wait in faith, knowledge and gratitude that my body…when ready…will easily be capable of.

In an effort to always be fully transparent here with y’all…

I did in fact attempt a head stand early on.

And OH MY HECK it was not as nearly as easy as the 70+-year-old woman perched on her head in front of me made it look.

Nooooo in fact I was ill prepared for the task at hand….hmmm, I mean head. And as much as I hate to admit it, began for the first time since having the dream of me at 50 head down…feet up…on the water…in Hawaii, to doubt that this dream would become a reality.

Gratefully I did not allow doubt to take hold!

Thankfully so.

Because today.

June 1st

exactly 5 months to the day

before my 50th birthday comes dancing it’s purdy little self on in here

I did my first ever head stand

And the roar of the crowd went wild

And a happy dance commenced once blood rushed back to my feet

And pride and sincere gratitude for the feat my body had just performed…filled me.

Now I realize I am still a LONG way from doing a handstand, on a paddle board, while out on the water. Hayels bells do I ever! AND even if Ms. Capricorn came out there on my board and held my feet up, I’d still be a LONG way off.

But today was a step.

One step.

Just a  step…

that is taking me in the direction I want to go.

Today and everyday, thank you, Ms. Capricorn for making it possible for yet another of my dreams to come true!

To the rest of y’all, hope you’ve had one heck of a great day.

As for me…

well…

I’m off to conquer homework, my bed, then tomorrow…the rest of the world.

Nite y’all